In yesterday’s email, “Hello from Singapore” I told about the foot massage I got – along with all the hanky-panky small talk leading up to it.
Well, a number of you wrote to ask whether the massage was good or not. And last night I found out, while having dinner with a couple Singaporean customers, what “going to the toilet” really means here.
Based upon what I was told last night, when you are in school in Singapore, you are not allowed to leave the classroom for any reason, unless you are going to “the toilet.” And so, the myriad of reasons to leave the classroom are reduced to the singular. No matter what you are going to do, it falls into the toilet.
This means that it’s possible that the man who wanted to give me a foot massage, but said he had to go to the toilet first, may have bypassed the toilet and only had a smoke. A habit begun as a child in school is still being used used – and the guy has no idea whatsoever that some may cringe when they see a mental picture of him going to the toilet, then giving a massage to you.
Now, lest you think this is a MALE thing, think again. Yesterday I got a 90-minute massage from a lady – and 60 minutes into the job she stopped and headed for the door. Just before opening it she looked back and said, “Sorry. I have to go to the toilet.”
Yes, very sorry. Very, very sorry you felt you had to tell me that. Now I’m sorry I have to ask if you washed your hands.
All toilet talk aside, who gives a better foot massage? Men or women?
Well, if you were to believe the man who told me women have no power, you’d be wrong.
I’ve had 90-pound girls in China apply knuckle pressure that made me jump. They look like they may have no power, but looks can be deceiving. As I like to say, “It’s not the size of the cat in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the cat.”
Two days ago, despite his sleeveless shirt and big guns, the dude was not as good as many of the women who’ve worked on my size 10’s. He gave me what the Chinese call “hua jiazi.” It’s a massage that looks as pretty as a flower, but doesn’t accomplish much of anything. It’s a surface-only treatment.
Maybe I would have been better off with Mr. Toilet Hands. Definitely better off with most women foot
reflexologists I’ve had.
And so, in my estimation, odds are 9-1 that a lady will always give me a better foot massage than a man.
The same goes for a body massage, albeit with different odds. More like 3-1.
Massage, whether it’s done by hired professionals or self-administered, is one of the keys to enhanced physical and mental well-being. Make it a regular part of your life and you’ll never look back.
Matt Furey
P.S. Want to live to be 100 in superior health? Then learn to massage the top three pressure points that govern your mind and body.