So I’m in the restaurant this morning, having a scrumptious breakfast following my workout. And the waitress approaches with a bag of coffee in hand.
“I have a question for you,” she says.
“Oh yeah. What is it?”
“Why are there air holes in coffee bags?”
“There are holes in coffee bags?” I say.
“Yes, look,” she says.
“Hmm,” I reply. “Might have something to do with gas. Might even be a coffee bean gas – which could be just as dangerous as green house gases.”
I reached for my handy i-phone and Googled her question. Within seconds I discovered that my joke was nearly correct. Roasted coffee beans give off carbon dioxide, so instead of waiting a day before slapping them inside a bag – which used to be the practice – the coffee people bag the beans then poke a small hold for the gas to escape.
Upon the waitress return to the table, I told her I had the answer. When she heard it she said, “So coffee farts.”
“Uh, well, uh, sumthun like that,” I replied.
After she walked away I got to thinking. People today are overloaded with gases of one sort or another. We like to refer to them as toxins. When we exercise we help rid our body of these gases and toxins. But, just like when we were babies, we accumulate gas after each and every meal.
In society today we’re encouraged not to belch or burp – we’re told that it’s rude. Yet we burp a baby after every meal.
Adults are no different than a baby – just older and filled with far more gases and toxins. So we need to be burped too – by ourselves.
When you do the Farmer Burns Stomach Flattener, for example, as well as the vacuum, as taught in Combat Abs – it’s not uncommon to have gas come up – or down. And it’s important to eliminate all
shyness – along with the gas – in private, of course. Unless you’re a Neanderthal – like me, hehe.
Like a bag of roasted coffee beans, we have a hole to let the excess gas out. In fact, we’ve got more than one – but who’s counting?
Use the hole in your face, ya know, that pie hole, to take in more oxygen and to let the carbon dioxide and other toxins out. Just like a baby, you’ll feel a sense of instant relief.
Kick butt – take names,
P.S. If you’re suffering from elbow tendinitis – aka “tennis elbow” – I’ve got good news for you. I’m releasing a DVD on this problem next week called, How to Eliminate Elbow Tendinitis. Stay tuned and together we’ll take care of what ails ya.